June 17, 2016 Interchanges

The Emotional Maturity Success Hack

This post was originally published by Interchanges CEO Chris Patterson on LinkedIn Pulse.

Are you mature enough to succeed?

I’ve been in business for more than 25 years now. In that time I have been able to observe and analyze what it takes for individuals to get promoted, advance and stretch their potential. I’ve found that one of the most important aspects for success is emotional maturity aka attitude. Here are a couple of signs that you are dealing with an emotionally mature person.

1) They are not easily offended.

These people can be poked and prodded verbally and yet somehow they always seem to just keep their cool. The reason many emotionally mature people are able to do so is that they have found happiness and simply refuse to allow anyone, anything or any circumstance steal their inner peace.

2) They generally trust people.

Instead of living paranoid and suspicious, they choose to believe the best about their family, co-workers and friends. These people are by no means naive however. They fully understand that life is not always Pollyanna. But instead of living on guard constantly, they rest and find commaradary in their relationships and deal with personal infractions on a case to case basis. In a nutshell, they trust people because they are trustworthy.

3) They are encouragers.

Mature individuals have focus on others peoples lives much more than they do on their own. This is very counter culture because generally it’s easy for all of us to get self absorbed from time to time. Encouraging and focusing on other people is simply a choice however. They choose to live their life making a difference in others rather than being constantly inward and selfish about their needs wants and desires.

4) They keep a proper perspective.

When I was a young man (and very immature) I would get very frustrated and lash out at people when things didn’t go my way. This was a deep desire for control in my life due to insecurity. The older I have become the more I realize that there are very very few things that actually deserve emotional outbursts and reaction. Instead when things go awry emotionally mature people know that it’s not the end of the world and they simply respond to problems, challenges and change instead of flipping out by reacting. Do you respond or react? Responding is the key.

5) They admit when they are wrong and apologize.

Let’s be honest. Who likes someone who messes up and refuses to admit it? No one. It’s infuriating. Yet often we will go great lengths to justify ourselves, cast blame, redirect the conversation and jump through every other hoop imaginable instead of simply saying just two very simple words…”I’m sorry”. People with high emotional intelligence are too smart for that. They say sorry when they are wrong because they know that the relationship is more important than being right. During an argument I was having with my wife a very wise friend asked me a question that I have never forgotten. “Chris, would you rather be happy or right?” I’m no rocket surgeon but it didn’t take me long to say sorry and get happy again.

The bottom line is that the more mature you are the wider the possibilities become because people will want to help you succeed and that you can be trusted with it. When you live with emotional immaturity, you are subconsciously telling the world that you are just not ready for the next level of life. I believe this pertains to many other areas of life as well, not just business. Now take a minute and think about that.

If you are struggling with some of these areas and would love to get ahead in life, or if you are a business owner looking to motivate your team, contact us today and stay up-to-date on our upcoming workshops and employee engagement strategies.

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